September 13, 2011
TODAY IN IDIOTS: This guy. Scenario:You are a state senator in a state where 2.6 million people (see also: a Shit Ton) (see also: it’s in the metric system) do not have health insurance, and the federal government has initiated a program that would set up low-cost exchanges where individuals can purchase said insurance policies for less money, and (get this) wants to GIVE YOU MONEY to set it up. Take it easy Scenario Buffs. I know what you’re thinking: “No Brainer. This is why I don’t do the Scenarios on Tuesday. Too easy.” Well you would be wrong, Scenario Buffs (See also: that’s a thing, right?), when thinking you would probably let the government give you that money so you can help provide a basic service to the Shit Ton of human beings in your state who would otherwise have to go to the emergency room and cost your state and ultimately its businesses and taxpayers more money. Listen here, Scenario Buffs, you need to stop thinking with your brain and start thinking with the play dough you’ve had surgically implanted into your head in place of a brain, because in this scenario you are Republican New York State Senatior Gregory R. Ball (pictured, handsomely, above) or any of his colleagues. “I would fight very vociferously to make sure that we’re not seen as implementing and expediting Obamacare,”said Mr. Ball. And not like, that was in a conversation he had with a buddy and somebody tape recorded it and played it the next day to his total embarrassment. He said that shit OUT LOUD and to members of the media. To paraphrase: “I would rather actively harm this state’s fiscal position AND not help sick people get affordable health care because I don’t want to be SEEN as implementing something my party is irrationally against.” And if you’re looking for cheap Balls jokes. Like “man this guy has balls.” Or, “look at the balls on that guy.” Or, “cool penis”. Look elsewhere. Because this is serious business. Blind partisanship at its best and an affront on logic and decency at it’s mediumist. I don’t want to talk about what it is at it’s worst. There are robots involved. Tomorrow’s scenario: What happens when a major political party stops being polite and starts fucking your shit up? Readers beware you’re in for a scare.

TODAY IN IDIOTS: This guy.

Scenario:
You are a state senator in a state where 2.6 million people (see also: a Shit Ton) (see also: it’s in the metric system) do not have health insurance, and the federal government has initiated a program that would set up low-cost exchanges where individuals can purchase said insurance policies for less money, and (get this) wants to GIVE YOU MONEY to set it up.

Take it easy Scenario Buffs. I know what you’re thinking: “No Brainer. This is why I don’t do the Scenarios on Tuesday. Too easy.”

Well you would be wrong, Scenario Buffs (See also: that’s a thing, right?), when thinking you would probably let the government give you that money so you can help provide a basic service to the Shit Ton of human beings in your state who would otherwise have to go to the emergency room and cost your state and ultimately its businesses and taxpayers more money.

Listen here, Scenario Buffs, you need to stop thinking with your brain and start thinking with the play dough you’ve had surgically implanted into your head in place of a brain, because in this scenario you are Republican New York State Senatior Gregory R. Ball (pictured, handsomely, above) or any of his colleagues.

“I would fight very vociferously to make sure that we’re not seen as implementing and expediting Obamacare,”said Mr. Ball. And not like, that was in a conversation he had with a buddy and somebody tape recorded it and played it the next day to his total embarrassment. He said that shit OUT LOUD and to members of the media.

To paraphrase: “I would rather actively harm this state’s fiscal position AND not help sick people get affordable health care because I don’t want to be SEEN as implementing something my party is irrationally against.”

And if you’re looking for cheap Balls jokes. Like “man this guy has balls.” Or, “look at the balls on that guy.” Or, “cool penis”. Look elsewhere. Because this is serious business. Blind partisanship at its best and an affront on logic and decency at it’s mediumist. I don’t want to talk about what it is at it’s worst. There are robots involved.

Tomorrow’s scenario: What happens when a major political party stops being polite and starts fucking your shit up? Readers beware you’re in for a scare.

1:11pm  |   URL: http://todayinpictures.tumblr.com/post/10167707864/today-in-idiots-this-guy-scenario-you-are-a
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