May 11, 2010
TINY ENVIRONMENTALIST IMPLANTED IN LAMAR MCKAY’S HEAD DRACONIAN PUNISHMENT IMPLIMENTED FOR GULF SPILL WASHINGTON – At a congressional hearing this Tuesday, Lamar McKay, president of BP America, was sentenced to the maximum fine of “one tiny hippy injected into the skull until you deal with this shit.” He was implanted at 3:15pm local time by Sen. Mary Landrieu, Democrat of Louisiana. The hearing had otherwise focused on what, if anything, could be done to halt the thousands of gallons of crude oil from continuing to spill across the gulf, a disaster that has been deemed by the New York Times as “the worst thing to happen to the Gulf of Mexico since white people.” While the top oil executives in the nation were giving their testimony, the very small environmentalist began purchasing posterboard and sharpie markers. At approximately 4:00 he posted on his blog, tinyenvironmentalist.blogspot.com, “Really in McKay’s head now. Does anyone know where I can score some weed?” Tomorrow, the panel will consider such measures as drilling a hole in the head of Transocean’s Executive Steve Newman, and waterboarding former Halliburton Exec Dick Cheney with scalding hot oil burned off from the Louisiana coast… please?

TINY ENVIRONMENTALIST IMPLANTED IN LAMAR MCKAY’S HEAD

DRACONIAN PUNISHMENT IMPLIMENTED FOR GULF SPILL

WASHINGTON – At a congressional hearing this Tuesday, Lamar McKay, president of BP America, was sentenced to the maximum fine of “one tiny hippy injected into the skull until you deal with this shit.” He was implanted at 3:15pm local time by Sen. Mary Landrieu, Democrat of Louisiana.

The hearing had otherwise focused on what, if anything, could be done to halt the thousands of gallons of crude oil from continuing to spill across the gulf, a disaster that has been deemed by the New York Times as “the worst thing to happen to the Gulf of Mexico since white people.”

While the top oil executives in the nation were giving their testimony, the very small environmentalist began purchasing posterboard and sharpie markers. At approximately 4:00 he posted on his blog, tinyenvironmentalist.blogspot.com, “Really in McKay’s head now. Does anyone know where I can score some weed?”

Tomorrow, the panel will consider such measures as drilling a hole in the head of Transocean’s Executive Steve Newman, and waterboarding former Halliburton Exec Dick Cheney with scalding hot oil burned off from the Louisiana coast… please?

5:53pm  |   URL: http://todayinpictures.tumblr.com/post/590533695/tiny-environmentalist-implanted-in-lamar-mckays
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